Boobies And Blood – Horror Movie Reviews

Little Deaths 2011

This anthology movie goes more in the direction of dark sexuality than actual horror. That is not to say it is bad, just not the same as most anthologies in the horror genre. All three tales are good, however none of them really surpass into excellence, The first, ‘House and Home’, is the strongest of the three. It keeps thinks interesting as you wonder what is going to happen next, your imagination trying to figure out exactly what the people plan to do. I have to say the reveal of this tale shocked me a bit. The second chapter ‘Mutant Tool’ (aka: evil nazi schlong experiment) was the weakest of the stories. I feel they could have fleshed it out a bit and gone to some more horrific places. Not to say it was bad, just the weakest. The final segment, ‘Bitch’  was the more artsy of the lot. It tried to make a good use of colors, but in the end, it felt like it was trying just a bit too hard. The only color they use is blue, with the occasional red and sometimes yellow. I feel it could have been handled better. The ending was done fantastically though, with the finale being ten minutes of no dialogue, and just imagery and music. In the end ‘Little Deaths’ goal of its content is original and worth seeing, with only three segments, it feels as though they are overlong, and they should have added a fourth.

Horror Rating: 2 out of 5

Boobies rating: 3 out of 5

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Jody Jameson

Siubhan Harrison

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Night of the Demons 2009

I am a huge fan of the original Night of the Demons. It was just great cheesy gory sleazy fun. And i am glad to say that although the remake isn’t as good as the original, it does recreate alot of what made the original film so good…great special make up and gore effects, more action than plot (who really needs a big overblown plot in a B-movie anyway), and lots of sleaze. The soundtrack is also pretty damn good (I was actually distracted from a decent girl-on-girl scene because of Type O Negative playing in the background!). I was also pleased that it wasn’t a carbon copy of the first movie, yet it didn’t try to completely re-write the entire story (like many of the remakes out there today). All in all it was a really fun Halloween film. If you are a fan of the original, check this one out.

Horror Rating: 2 out of 5

Boobies Rating: 3 out of 5

shannon elizabeth

diora baird

Unknown nude

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Teeth 2006

Expecting a low budget campy inde flick, “Teeth” actually has a much higher production value than I expected. The biggest surprise was the laughs. I never found the film horrifying, though it was quite shocking from time to time. It is not the type of film that is going to make you scared to leave home. As a Gore/Comedy I found it absolutely hilarious. The blood squirting was a real riot. What a great concept, “vag*n@ dentata.” I even looked it up on line after the movie. Who would have thought. The plot is rather oblivious and although you see it coming a mile away, I found my hollering “No don’t do it, don’t, no …. OOOHHH!! He did!!” [queue the laughter]. LOL. The film never crosses over into gritty exploitation but it is certain not for every one. The female nudity is limited one tasteful scene, and of coarse there is teen sex. Some scenes are rather graphic (with male privates) but even for those hiding their eyes and peering through fingers, it is much more fun that I expected. “Teeth” is VERY worth watching; if for nothing more than its sheer originality and solid entertainment value.

Horror Rating: 4 out of 5 (we are talking multi severed penis here!!)

Boobies rating :1 out of 5

Jess Weixler

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Wizard of Gore 2007 UR

Cripin Glover owns this movie. He’s never given a performance this full of life; he plays Montage the Magician with all the glee of a fratboy who just got the new Madden. No nervous ticks or stammering stutters that are hallmarks of his acting style; here, he’s almost normal. He’s the ultimate used car salesman working his slight of hand to get viewers to buy into what would be a lemon without him. That’s not to say the remake of THE WIZARD OF GORE is all bad, far from it, but the final 5 minutes of predictably contrived nonsense seriously undermines the prior 90 minutes of complete psychotronic headtripping that’s built around blured layers of reality. It’s been years since I’ve seen the original WOG, but I remember thinking it was just as terrible as any other H.G. Lewis film (his importance on the genre isn’t lost on me, but let’s face facts, those movies are pretty disposable – fun, but disposable). Improving upon the original shouldn’t have been hard, but casting Glover is a stoke of genius. He leads a cast that’s a veritable who’s who of the genre. The most notable of which is Jeffrey Combs, who you might not recognize under all his make-up – I didn’t.Director Jeremy Kasten utilizes these great characters to full effect in a story that’s pure 40′s pulp. While Kip Pardue is no Boggart, he wanders through the noirish visuals looking for answers like a half-derranged Sam Spade high on smack and lusting for the Suicide Girls. It’s the Suicide Girls who provide the film with its most exploitative elements, a fact spelled out by the always lovely Bijou Phillips. Montage is misogyny personified, and through the Girl’s butchered bare skin he revels in his hatred for women, or so her sentiments lead us to believe. Figuring out what’s really taking place on stage is all part of the movie’s charm.

Horror Rating: 2 out of 5 (gore lots of fake blood)

Boobies Rating: 5 out of 5

Amina Munster

Amina Munster

Cricket DeManuel

Flux Suicide

Unknown Actress

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Cat People 1982

“Cat People” is old (1982), tired looking (I’ve yet to hear of a re-mastered release) and has a redundant, home organ sound track that drives me crazy. Yet, after all these years, this is still one of my all time favorite horror movies. Roger Ebert calls it a “Really well realized horror flick.” I’m not exactly sure I know what that means, but I think I agree. The film stars Malcolm McDowell as Paul Gallier and Nastassja Kinski as his sister, Irena. The crux of the story is based in a legion that says, “Eons ago there was a land where humans sacrificed their most beautiful women to leopards. The Leopards then mated with them. Cat People may look human, but they can only mate with other Cat People to sustain their life of a human who can transmorph into a leopard and back. Paul lives in New Orleans with a housekeeper who, knowing the reality of the legion, also acts as his protector and keeper. Irena, raised by foster parents, comes to be with brother but he senses her sexual awakenings and expects an incestuous relationship that will maintain the status quo. When his advances are rejected, a series of events are unleashed that has turned “Cat People” into a cult classic. Some call this a remake of a 1942 classic of the same name. I’ve seen both and disagree. Alan Ormsby did a complete reworking of the script going back to DeWitt Bodeen’s novel for his source material. In my opinion, except for the music, the 1982 version is not just a different motional picture, it’s a far superior motion picture. With McDowell at the height of his weird creepiness and Kinski at the height of her beauty.

Horror Rating: 1 out of 5

Boobies Rating: 4 out of 5

Annette O'Toole

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2001 Maniacs Field of Screams 2010

“2001 Maniacs” (2005) was a very fun B-Grade gore fest. It even had an indefinable mystique that helped it transcend its material. (Maybe it was the creepy Civil War overtones that were actually taken somewhat seriously amongst all the silly mayhem?) It also had Robert Englund as the mayor, in a performance that was a perfect mix of camp and sinister relish. He managed to pull off a hammy character that somehow was not over-the-top. Well… Now we have a sequel that has lost both the mystique AND Robert Englund. (Bill Moseley is the mayor now. He is a good actor and well liked by us slash fans but it is a thankless task to take on a part that somebody else already put their stamp on.) Some of the other characters return but they feel different… Crossing the line from camp into cornball. The difference? Cornball starts to get old about halfway through. It goes from fun (I enjoyed the first half-hour or so) to downright annoying after a while. In short: A disappointing sequel.

Horror Rating: 2 out of 5

Boobies Rating: 3 out of 5

Alana Curry

Nicole Rae

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Asa Hope

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Hello Marylou Prom Night II 1987

HELLO MARY LOU has nothing to do with the original PROM NIGHT—save one thing—the name of the High School. The film also borrows heavily from past horror success stories—CARRIE, THE EVIL DEAD, A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and THE EXORCIST. Even with all of these minor references the duality of PROM NIGHT II and CARRIE is profoundly blatant and at times almost embarrassingly plagiaristic. Much in the same manner as NIGHT OF THE CREEPS the characters in Pittman’s film are named after the great horror directors—Carpenter, Browning, Romero and even a Kelly Hennenlotter and an “Eddie” Wood. All of this seems custom designed to spoof the genre. Instead the cast plays the film straight as an arrow—without the least hint of irony. The film’s supernatural elements overshadow the traditional HALLOWEEN-esque slasher formula of the original production in favor of a surrealist nightmare fantasy where Vicki is no longer in control of her actions. The film hints and later delivers several shocking moments, including implied lesbianism and a—too long—shot of the possessed Vicki passionately incestually kissing her father before she heads off to the prom. It’s the moments like this—woven into a standard 1980’s teen script that make PROM NIGHT II stand apart from the late 80’s gridlock of mediocre genre fare. On paper, PROM NIGHT II should be a colossal failure. It has no basis in the original production—which has sadly not aged well. The screenplay has accounted for virtually every cliché ever written from John Carpenter to John Hughes. The dialogue is heavily dated and the performances are tinged with Canadian casting inflections—that the entire production feels like a lost episode of DeGrassi Junior High at best and an After-School Special at worst. Yet, somehow in the midst of this perfect storm of cheese, the film manages to still entertain to this day

Horror Rating: 2 out of 5

Boobies Rating:2 out of 5

Beverly Hendry Wendy Lyon

Wendy Lyon

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Videodrome 1983

A truly remarkable film, Videodrome is sure to offend and irritate more people than it pleases, but for those of us who are on an eternal quest for something original, this one fits the bill perfectly. Oddly unknown given it’s influence on other films – it was squashed together with “The Sixth Sense” to make the film “The Ring,” and was virtually remade by Cronenberg as “Existenz” – it is a marvelously entertaining, disgusting, frustrating, confusing mess of a film that is tied together by a fitting, though deeply disturbing, ending. Woods gives maybe his best performance outside of “Salvador,” but the rest of the cast is adequate at best, and Harry seems to have been hired for her marketability (at the time) more than her talent. This one has ample doses of Cronenberg’s typical coldness, nihilism, and pitch-black humor, and this is probably the best archetype for his pictures. If you like him, you’ll love this. If you are offended by, well, pretty much anything, you probably want to pass on this as well as the rest of the directors’ films.

Horror Rating: 1 out of 5 Not much of a horror movie rather then a sci fi-however there is blood and there are boobs.

Boobies Rating: 2 out of 5

Unknown Actress

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Screaming Dead 2003

Remember, these guys started out as a bunch of college kids who loved movies and ran around with a video camera making their own sexy slasher flicks. Finally they got someone with a few bucks to back this movie. They made a tidy sum doing sexy Showtime After Dark type movies until they were able to pull off their first attempt at a “mainstream” B movie. This is it. It’s not extremely scary, but it’s very dark and spooky. It’s also a rip-off of lots of other horror flicks (It’s almost an item by item copy of House on Haunted Hill), but if you go into with the idea of just having fun with it, it’s not all that bad. The opening 5 minutes introducing the main psycho character is awesome, and you never really figure this guy out. Is he just an artist, a pervert, or totally insane? You’ll never quite be sure. And Misty can strip and scream along with the very best of the B movie girls! There’s a lot worse things you can waste your 88 minutes on!

Horror Rating: 2 out of 5

Boobies Rating: 3 out of 5

C.J. DiMarsico

Misty Mundae

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The Hazing 2004

I was genuinely surprised with this one. It’s campy, silly and fun with some gore, not over the top gore though. Still, this seems to be done by people who understand and revere the horror genre and for that it gets my respect. All the prerequisites are there. The cheesy characters are all present for a real send up to the genre! All about fun and popcorn really. Yeah, a little Evil Dead mixed with Night of the Demons but why not? Those are some of the best of the genre to pull from, especially when you are paying homage to them. Don’t rent for Brooke Burke alone, she’s only in it for a couple of minutes in the beginning. Do rent for Tiffany and Nectar. Especially Tiffany and her silver suit, hilarious. Ms. Shepis is definitely an actress who loves what she’s doing and loves this genre as do I, and it shows. This is a guilty pleasure for all of us B-Horror movie fans out there and you get the venerable Brad Dourif to complete your fun B-movie experience! I liked it!

Horror Rating: 2 out of 5

Boobies Rating: 2 out of 5

Unknown Actress

Nectar Rose

Tiffany Shepis

More Nudes From The Hazing Here!

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